You Can Tell by Everyones Tears that We Will Remember It All

     I am not really sure where to even begin this entry as today was far from an easy day.  Today was my last bit of time with Masha.  The girls are headed down to Dallas to take Masha to the airport early in the morning.  It has taken until about now for me to collect some of my thoughts and be able to write down anything.   I am usually a pro at keeping it together in front of people and not showing emotions. Today was not the case I completely lost my composure.   This good bye was especially difficult due to the possibility that it could be a real good bye.  A good bye where you do not see the person again, and in this case we are knowingly sending her back to an awful place.  Yes, we knew this was going to happen, and we knew it would be hard.  What I did not count on was how much we as a family we would fall in love with Masha, including myself.  The best way I can describe it is, she just fits.  She is an exceptional girl that deserves so much more. This experience exceeded anything in my wildest dreams.  I never thought a stranger could come in my house and in five weeks work her way into my heart.  That is how special this little girl is.  I hope to one day pay back the favor she gave to us. She has changed my heart for the better.
    Now it is time to move on to the next step.  Getting Masha Back!   We have started most of the paperwork before she got here, but stopped due to our skepticism or lack of faith I am not sure.  I would like to say that it was healthy cautiousness.  Now we are going to try to make up for lost time.  We are just 2 visits and a check away from our home study being done.  From there I have no idea what to expect.  I am sure once the home study is complete and we know that Masha is available we will know much more about the process.  We do know just enough to know this will not be an easy road.  We have heard everything from nightmare stories about things being drug out for months to stories of things going off without a hitch.  We are hoping that having everything ready from the beginning will help things go smoothly. Until then we will save as much money as possible, and pray that everything works out for the best. (We have heard it may be possible to get her back home by Christmas. I pray this is true.)
  Our last few days were beyond great with Masha.  We have packed as much quality time as we could in 3 days. We drove sports cars, rode roller coasters, went to the movies, and almost pulled an all nighter laughing at each others inability to communicate beyond 5 words on the translator.  Tomorrow I head back to work while Masha gets on a plane back to the Ukraine.    There was so much more I wanted to say to her, but could not. It was heart breaking to let her go without any reassurance. Due to the rules of this program we are not able to discuss adoption.  The most I could I do is tell her we hope to see her again, we love her, and that we will do our best to stay in contact.  If there is one down side to the program that is it. I could go into detail, but that policy is for the best for all involved. I will say I wish I was a special exception, but we are not.  There is so much more I want to say so maybe in another blog. Right now I would like to let the pictures speak for themselves.

She definitely Fits in with the Sisters

One of My Few Pictures

She felt like posing

Test Drive Day

Express Clydesdales 

Two Amazing Girls

Favorite Ride at the Park

Repeat of Picture

Playing with Camera